Whether it’s where I’m eating, where I’m traveling or, God forbid, something I’m buying, like a lot of people in my generation—those in their 20s and 30s—I feel compelled to do a ton of research to make sure I’m getting every option and then making the best choice.
If this mentality pervades our decisionmaking in so many realms, is it also affecting how we choose a romantic partner?
Dating for example, still has what psychologists call Research suggests that women are pickier when it comes to potential partners in a speed dating event, with men indicating interest with half the women participating and women only indicating interest in roughly one third of them who participate.
Let’s try this example—imagine a man and a women in a bar or nightclub on separate sides of the room.
If you have any respect for the other person, or if you want to avoid bad times in the future, don’t ghost. Who wants to blow a good 15 minutes to half an hour waiting for someone, anyway? Most would feel safe to say that if a guy is sending you a d*ck pic, he’s probably not looking for Ms. Unless you’re looking for a fling with a jackass, just pass. Nowadays, the most common way to show disinterest is not replying.
You don’t have to reply to initial messages if you’re not interested. It’s not traditionally polite, but at least it will cut sh*t short fast. Otherwise, people think you’re fake, married, or on the lam. While you’re at it, it’s important to remember that overly sexy pictures will not work out in your favor if you’re looking for an LTR.
I asked my dad about this experience, and here’s how he described it: he told his parents he was ready to get married, so his family arranged meetings with three neighboring families. That’s how my dad decided on the person with whom he was going to spend the rest of his life.
Sadly, the days in which guys were expected to pay the entire date are over.We start to create this impression of what we think this person might be like, and then as a result we don’t always give them an honest chance.